melt even my hardened heart. I was taken over by feelings that I didn’t expect so soon. Guilt plagued me and I
took my anger out on her.
dogs. Originally from Yorkshire, England, Lisa now resides in Scotland – her favourite place in the world.
in the past it has centered on poetry and song lyrics. The story in her debut novel had been building in her mind for a long while but until the relocation, she never had the time to put it down in black and white; working full time and studying swallowed up any spare time she had. Making the move north of the border to Scotland has given Lisa the opportunity to spread her wings and fulfill her dream. Writing is now a deep passion and she has enjoyed every minute of working towards being published.
declared dead. The love of my fucking life… dead.
There were no words to describe the physical pain knotting my insides every
time I realised it was true and not just a cruel dream.
people are lost up the side of a mountain like K2. People can lie undiscovered
for years up there, so I’m told.
some bizarre reason my psyche had built up its own series of events and
insisted on torturing me with the movie of Mairi’s death every time I closed my
for a peaceful night’s sleep.
only a seasonal thing anyway. And although tourists loved the area surrounding
the bridge over the Atlantic, taking a trip out on Little Blue on choppy water wasn’t for fainthearted, unseasoned
sailors. So I’d taken on work as a handyman. I was fixing taps, sealing sinks,
unblocking drains. Oddly, all the jobs seemed to be water related. Maybe that
was because I had a combination of water and single malt running through ma veins.
stopping me from slipping into a deep depression, and I knew all too well how
easy it would’ve been just to let go and fall into the abyss like Mairi did in
ever falling in love for real. I’d had a shot at it before—Alice was her name,
but the less said about her right now the better. But life likes to throw in
curveballs every so often. And so there I was up by the Buckle, taking in the
scenery and fresh air, when this fiery-haired girl tripped over her laces and
into my arms. She had the most stunning smile I’d ever seen. And her eyes…
Let’s just say when she gazed up at me she melted my heart. We chatted for ages
and it was just… so natural.
trouble keeping up, if you know what I mean. I loved every inch of her body
with a passion I’d never experienced before. It was raw and real. I’d sit
watching her as she studied maps and reference books about climbing. Every so
often she’d glance up and catch me staring and she’d just smile, climb into my
lap, and kiss me.
let’s just say that she was a nasty piece of work who messed with my head and
broke my heart, more than once—I swore off love and all it entailed. I didn’t need a woman in my life. Or so I
thought. But when I lost Mairi, it was like someone had ripped out ma heart and
stamped on it whilst I watched. The pain was excruciating.
climbers. She was an experienced mountaineer too. It’d been her dream for so long. I wasn’t about to stand in
her way, and the thought that she may not come back never even entered my head.
service we held was devoid of emotion. It was as if her friends and family were
in some kind of denial.
couldn’t stop myself.
as she slept. She was exposed to me from the waist up and I lay there on my
side, willing her to awaken. I wasn’t going to see her for months and I wanted
to get my fill whilst I still could. I gently stroked her chin, down between
her creamy bare breasts to her navel. It was cruel but I wanted her to open her
eyes. Instead she whacked my hand away and muttered expletives. I burst out
laughing, trying my best to do it quietly but failing miserably.
making me chuckle again. “Gregory McBradden, you’re a total shit. I was having
a really sexy dream,” she whined, eyes still closed.
and let’s make your dream come true, love.” That got her every time. Goose
bumps pricked her skin and she moaned. Her eyes sprang open and she pounced on
me, pushing me onto my back and straddling my waist.
hard, but seeing her like this did something to my insides and brought out the
animalistic side of me. I gripped her hips as I inhaled a deep breath, trying
my best to calm the furnace raging beneath my skin. As she bent to take my
mouth in a deep, sensual kiss, her hair cascaded to my chest. Our tongues
slipped and slid together in an erotic dance, and every nerve in my body sprang
to life just for her. Every fibre of my being was drawn to her; needed her.
to miss you when you’re gone? It doesn’t matter how far apart we are. You’re
still in here,” I said, touching my head. “And in here.” I touched my chest
over my heart. She stared silently at me for a moment and then closed her eyes.
A tear slipped down her cheek and I caught it with my thumb. “Hey, what’s
trip. K2 has been my dream for so long, but now… I’m terrified. What if I’m not
fit enough? What if I can’t do it, Greg?”
me, to the dip between her hip and waist as my eyes followed the journey of my
fingers. I swallowed hard at the feel of her muscles tightening under my
caress, and my breath caught in my throat as I replied, “Come on, love, you are fit enough and strong enough. You’ve
been working towards this for so long, how could you not be? You’re bound to be
nervous. But you’re fulfilling a dream, and there’s not many folk can say
they’ve done that. You’ll be fine. Absolutely fine. But I might not be.” I
stuck out my bottom lip, trying to lighten the mood. “My heart might break into
a million pieces when I’m left here by mysel’. What will I do?”
her hands down my chest and it was my turn to shiver.
cheer you up.” She rolled her hips, making me bite my lip.
again so I can do this again…” In one sweep of my arms I had her beneath me, my
body between her silky thighs. I sank into her, pleasure radiating from where
we were joined. “… is what I’ll be looking forward to.”
welcomed me in and slipped her arms around my neck. I kissed her everywhere I
could reach, taking each nipple into my mouth slowly and nibbling on the little
buds as they tightened. Gasping, she fixed her eyes on mine as I moved deep
I took in every sensation and every look; my heart aching at the thought of
being apart from her for so long. As she pulsed around me and her orgasm took
her soaring off into the stratosphere, I kept my gaze locked on hers, hoping I
was conveying everything through my eyes that I couldn’t put into words, and I
followed soon after.
I was unwilling to let her go, telling myself I’d hold her for a few minutes
more. When she eventually withdrew from my embrace, I lay back and fought the
fears niggling deep within me.
who loves climbing the way she does? What if she doesn’t miss me as much as I
miss her? What if she loves it so much out there that she decides to stay? What
if? What if? What fucking if?
part of the journey we both sat in silent contemplation. There were so many
things I wanted to say, but the words never came and I cursed myself for being
so fucking useless at expressing myself.
songs to express how I felt and I’d made a CD. The silence in the car was
deafening and so I reached over and hit play. I made eye contact with her for a
few moments as the opening chords to “I Will Remember You” by Ryan Cabrera
filled the small space between us. Turning my eyes back to the road, I saw her
in my peripheral vision, wiping her eyes as her lip trembled.
I knew she must have felt the rapid pounding of my heart as we stood inside the
terminal. Tears threatened. My eyes were desperate to give them up, but I tried
so hard not to make the situation more difficult than it already was.
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I pulled away and gazed into her emerald eyes
one last time.
hate that word and we’ll be back together before you know it anyway. So I’m
going to say have a great time and stay safe. And know that I’ll be thinking of
you every moment whilst you’re gone.”
away. I fisted my hands in her hair and returned the kiss with equal passion.
When I eventually pulled away, I cupped her face in my hands and stroked the
apples of her cheeks with my thumbs. “It’s just a few months, love. Go and show
’em what you’re made of, eh?”
tears spilled from her eyes as she let go and turned to walk away. All my fears
bubbled to the surface once again and I couldn’t hold back. “I love you, Mairi.
And one day I want to marry you!” I shouted.
what’s on my mind without thinking about the consequences, and this was one of
those times. I was filled with dread. Had I just given her a ticket to
Get-Out-Ville? Again, fuck! My heart hammered like it was trying to do a
fucking runner and my mouth went dry.
open in what I can only describe as utter, mind-frying shock. I swallowed hard,
my mind racing to find something to say to take the words back. But a beautiful
smile appeared on her face. She ran toward me and flung her arms around my
neck, her legs around my waist. Everyone around us applauded as I hugged her
into my body before letting her go and setting her down again. With one last
heart-melting smile she stroked my cheek, turned, and walked away.